i got 5 phone calls from mathematician yesterday. maybe it was more, because i turned the phone off at one point. i won’t even TELL you what he did to me on sunday, but suffice it to say, it was likely ranked in the top five, maybe even top two, worst things ever done to me by a man i was “dating.” seriously. he only left a message on the last call, and it was asking me to go for a walk, as if NOTHING had happened. oh my god. of course i did not answer or call back. all feelings for him are dead. it’s that simple.

i just saw offline messages from the doctor, apologizing again for what he did sunday–breaking our date 2 hours before it, for as far as i am concerned, a shitty ass reason. he asked if i would forgive him and have dinner tomorrow evening. which was what he offered on sunday, but i refused and yelled at him and hung up. i’m tempted to forgive him, but, i just keep thinking–you must not really want to see me very bad if you broke our date the first time we were supposed to see each other after 2 years.

i’m tempted to go- why? because it would be nice for the mathematician to see the doctor drive up in his new silver lexus to pick me up. it’s tempting.